too much pressure already . I've yet to get over you . & there it goes, somebody else make my heart break into pieces . sometimes I ask myself . why should I even make an effort to understand ppl when they dont even understand me ? I broke down many times . & im getting tired of it . but I just cant help it . Im stressed over you, & sometimes e others just have to make it worse .
Im sorry cousins for not being there w you all . Im just not okay for now . I know Ive been avoiding you guys . I need sometime for myself . & that is, I wna do wht i wna do, go whrvr I wna go, be w whoever I wna be with . but e problem is tht, I just cant !
I felt being controlled too much already . & I cant take it any longer . I wish I cld just go against my parents wish . Sometimes I feel, they're too much . but to think again, they're doing this for my own good . but is this over-reacting already ? they told me this & that . & I heed their advice . they told me to not cntct w you, I tried my very best . only e first few days, I cant help it but to just cntct w you . But you yourself seemed to be very different when I text you. you really took my parent's words to heart . you told me to move on . how to ? you cld & you wld . But I just cldnt . you left a great impact on my life . & idk why . I just love you . that is why . but I dont understand why though ! I tried really hard to forget you . but e more I tried to forget, e more I wld think of it . putting on fake smiles & laughters . very tired ~ coz I know when Im alone, things will be different . I'll cry my heart out .
I wonder what you're doing now . I miss you so much . but I dont think you even bother to know how Im doing . everytime Mum tried to asked me along to here & there, I felt so reluctant to follow . coz I dnt feel like it . there she goes giving such remarks which make me feel even more worse ! she shld jolly well know how Im feeling all this while . but looks like she didnt . I dnt blame her . but Im very dissapointed . Im just, too sad . I cldnt describe how sad I am. but Im just v v v v v v v sad . & today is e 28th . I doubt you rmmbr anything about 28th . idk wht else to say . my heart's broken into pieces . noone understands me . totally . can go crazy ahhh ~
as for tmr, mind me if Im dreaming too much while studying . coz all this matters really distracts me in studying . & Im so not prepared for ct . That's it .
That's just a nick . Khairun Sofia it is .
I may not be a loud or friendly person, but do getta know me well first before you judge me .
Im nice okey ? Haha . I love my family, I love Fiqqy♡. Thankyou ☺